Oldest paves the way for milestones

Maria, my youngest child, had her kindergarten graduation recently. I was fully prepared to cry.

When RJ, my oldest child, graduated from kindergarten 13 years ago, I was a mess. I sobbed uncontrollably. My husband, Mike, made fun of me, and RJ sheepishly smiled at me. When my 8-year-old triplet boys graduated from kindergarten two years ago, I got a little choked up, but I thought I was less emotional because I still had Maria.

The 60 or so 5- and 6-year-olds who had gathered to sing songs intended to entertain the parents, relatives and friends, show us what they had learned in a year and, yes, break our hearts were perfect. Occasionally, Maria would play with her hair instead of making a giant sun with her arms. She couldn't snap her fingers quite as well as the girl next to her. She waved at me a lot. But she looked beautiful.

When she marched up the aisle to get her diploma, I was very proud of her. But, strangely, this year, my eyes were dry. I couldn't believe that I didn't cry at her graduation when I cried at the Thanksgiving celebration when the children sang a sappy song about being thankful for moms. My heartless kids kept checking me out with these goofy grins on their faces, just waiting for the waterworks to start flowing. I hate that my babies are growing up so fast. I know in a blink, they will be gone. I always thought kindergarten graduation was the cutest ceremony but also unbelievably painful. This year, it was just really cute.

I spoke with some of the other moms to see if there was something wrong with me. Emma's mom told me that kindergarten graduation was the toughest with the first child. She also was surprised that she was less emotional with her second child. My mother-in-law echoed the sentiment, but told me that I shouldn't worry. My heart will be torn in two when Maria graduates from high school.

I love that my mother-in-law has never missed an important event in my children's lives. She flies out all the way from Kansas City. My kids always know that she will be here. I used to have the only grandchildren, but now there are seven more in addition to my five, so she's going to be challenged pretty quickly as my nieces and nephews on my husband's side of the family, who are scattered all over the U.S., are all starting preschool. But I'm certain she'll somehow pull it all off.

This school year, we were very fortunate because our room mother was incredible. I am constantly amazed at the people who volunteer for this thankless duty. The selfless commitment to the kids and the parents to fulfill this role requires many hours of work and coordination among the parents. The room mother is the go-to parent for the teachers and is solely responsible for arranging many functions. While the rest of us were able to give our room mother a small token of our appreciation, I certainly hope she realizes how important her hard work and dedication were to our successful kindergarten year.

My oldest son has finished his first year of college. My triplet boys are finishing the second grade. Summer vacation is here again. Life goes by so fast.

Lisa Brown is a Mount Pleasant working mother of five children ages 6-19. E-mail her at lbrown@postandcourier.com.